Is this the best question you can ask for mental wellbeing?


Organisations and individuals around the country teamed up this Thursday to spread the message: three little words can improve mental wellbeing. No, really – and here’s how.

R U OK? Day aims to raise awareness about mental wellbeing by reminding people everywhere that we are our brother’s and sister’s keeper. Small gestures such as asking your desk mate “Are you OK?” might seem trivial, but as the saying goes: a problem shared is a problem halved.  

“We have this perception that it’s inappropriate to ask people at work ‘Are you OK?’, but it’s really not,” says Rebecca Lewis, campaign manager for R U OK? “We spend a large chunk of our day at the office with our workmates, so businesses need to encourage employees to reach out to one another.”

It’s a symptom of modern life that online relationships sometimes feel more real than interpersonal ones. A national survey by R U OK? found that people are more connected to their screens than real people. Around half of Australians spend less than two hours a week talking with friends, family or co-workers.

The survey also revealed that while Australians want to spend more quality time with loved ones, distance, lack of energy, packed schedules and long work hours get in the way.

However, those eight-or-more hours a day at work are prime time for workplaces to strengthen the mental and emotional wellbeing of employees. “Beyond the human imperative of caring about the wellbeing of others, it’s good business practice as well,” says Lewis.

Not only that, workers have come to expect it. A 2012 study found that 78 per cent of employees believe their employer has a responsibility to provide support for mental health issues. A further 64 per cent said they think workplace support programs encourage people to address mental wellbeing issues.

There are some key things workplaces can do to promote a culture of mutual sharing and openness, says Lewis. As with most initiatives, it starts at the top.

“Leadership needs to be on board, otherwise it won’t take,” she says. “Employers should create opportunities for employees to bond and have time together, whether that’s going out for coffee, work drinks, team activities – whatever.” Peer-to-peer connections are the most effective way to create a culture where employees feel safe to speak up about mental wellbeing issues, she says.

Lewis adds that human resources and other company leaders should role model these behaviours and, if possible, ask individuals to share their experiences. This normalises the behaviour, and helps break stigmas about being intrusive, or feeling like no one really wants to know your problems.

When someone does open up, the best thing you can do is to listen, not judge and not try to “fix” the person. Always ask questions to understand what they are going through, and identify the next steps. This might mean talking to a manager or seeking out employee assistance programs, says Lewis.

In an age where we are all glued to our computers or binge watching Netflix, popping your head over the cubicle wall is a simple – yet effective – way to reconnect. Who knows, you might even make a new friend.

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Joe Morrison
Joe Morrison
7 years ago

Well, actually no. ‘R U OK’ is a closed question and may come across as intrusive. How would I answer: yes, no, or MYOB? Am I OK by my standard of OK or your standard of OK? What if meeting some standard of OKness is not as important as feeling challenged, inspired or fulfilled just now? What if I just prefer to focus on my work today because that’s the only part of my life actually going OK? Maybe I’m grieving or sad for a lost relationship, a deceased parent or a lost physical function but It’s progressing normally but… Read more »

Bernie Crawford
Bernie Crawford
7 years ago

While Joe’s comments are strictly correct, “R U OK?” is becoming a brand in its own right where the conveyed meaning is “I am concerned about you and want to help if I can”. Thirty years ago I would have totally agreed with Joe, but not now. Let’s do all we can to promote the notion of building up the spirit of other people at work and promote the supportive meaning of “R U OK?”.

Amanda Woodard, Editor HRM
Amanda Woodard, Editor HRM
7 years ago

Joe and Bernie I think you are both correct. While campaigns such as R U OK? can appear a bit trite and superficial, they at least focus attention on the fact that a lot of us at work struggle with difficult personal stuff and aren’t always coping so well with it. If it achieves the aim of making us a bit more sensitive to each other’s wellbeing, then that’s a good thing. However, I would hope that many people don’t take the phrase literally and approach their colleagues with more empathy, as Joe suggests, by asking more open-ended questions. And… Read more »

Gino Caspro
Gino Caspro
7 years ago

There is a danger in asking ‘R U OK?’ when not suitably prepared for a negative response. Leadership particularly, when approaching staff need to have an understanding of where appropriate supports can be accessed should they uncover both personal and or medical issues for their staff. Really, the concept of ‘R U OK?’ can be a can of worms for organisations who should consider the capability of their leadership in dealing with personal or medical issues and the resilience of health and wellbeing strategies – particularly mental health – to be strategically positioned to adequately respond and afford support.

Tom
Tom
7 years ago

How about “Check-In” day? Ask people to ask people to check in before the start of each meeting.

More on HRM

Is this the best question you can ask for mental wellbeing?


Organisations and individuals around the country teamed up this Thursday to spread the message: three little words can improve mental wellbeing. No, really – and here’s how.

R U OK? Day aims to raise awareness about mental wellbeing by reminding people everywhere that we are our brother’s and sister’s keeper. Small gestures such as asking your desk mate “Are you OK?” might seem trivial, but as the saying goes: a problem shared is a problem halved.  

“We have this perception that it’s inappropriate to ask people at work ‘Are you OK?’, but it’s really not,” says Rebecca Lewis, campaign manager for R U OK? “We spend a large chunk of our day at the office with our workmates, so businesses need to encourage employees to reach out to one another.”

It’s a symptom of modern life that online relationships sometimes feel more real than interpersonal ones. A national survey by R U OK? found that people are more connected to their screens than real people. Around half of Australians spend less than two hours a week talking with friends, family or co-workers.

The survey also revealed that while Australians want to spend more quality time with loved ones, distance, lack of energy, packed schedules and long work hours get in the way.

However, those eight-or-more hours a day at work are prime time for workplaces to strengthen the mental and emotional wellbeing of employees. “Beyond the human imperative of caring about the wellbeing of others, it’s good business practice as well,” says Lewis.

Not only that, workers have come to expect it. A 2012 study found that 78 per cent of employees believe their employer has a responsibility to provide support for mental health issues. A further 64 per cent said they think workplace support programs encourage people to address mental wellbeing issues.

There are some key things workplaces can do to promote a culture of mutual sharing and openness, says Lewis. As with most initiatives, it starts at the top.

“Leadership needs to be on board, otherwise it won’t take,” she says. “Employers should create opportunities for employees to bond and have time together, whether that’s going out for coffee, work drinks, team activities – whatever.” Peer-to-peer connections are the most effective way to create a culture where employees feel safe to speak up about mental wellbeing issues, she says.

Lewis adds that human resources and other company leaders should role model these behaviours and, if possible, ask individuals to share their experiences. This normalises the behaviour, and helps break stigmas about being intrusive, or feeling like no one really wants to know your problems.

When someone does open up, the best thing you can do is to listen, not judge and not try to “fix” the person. Always ask questions to understand what they are going through, and identify the next steps. This might mean talking to a manager or seeking out employee assistance programs, says Lewis.

In an age where we are all glued to our computers or binge watching Netflix, popping your head over the cubicle wall is a simple – yet effective – way to reconnect. Who knows, you might even make a new friend.

Subscribe to receive comments
Notify me of
guest

5 Comments
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Joe Morrison
Joe Morrison
7 years ago

Well, actually no. ‘R U OK’ is a closed question and may come across as intrusive. How would I answer: yes, no, or MYOB? Am I OK by my standard of OK or your standard of OK? What if meeting some standard of OKness is not as important as feeling challenged, inspired or fulfilled just now? What if I just prefer to focus on my work today because that’s the only part of my life actually going OK? Maybe I’m grieving or sad for a lost relationship, a deceased parent or a lost physical function but It’s progressing normally but… Read more »

Bernie Crawford
Bernie Crawford
7 years ago

While Joe’s comments are strictly correct, “R U OK?” is becoming a brand in its own right where the conveyed meaning is “I am concerned about you and want to help if I can”. Thirty years ago I would have totally agreed with Joe, but not now. Let’s do all we can to promote the notion of building up the spirit of other people at work and promote the supportive meaning of “R U OK?”.

Amanda Woodard, Editor HRM
Amanda Woodard, Editor HRM
7 years ago

Joe and Bernie I think you are both correct. While campaigns such as R U OK? can appear a bit trite and superficial, they at least focus attention on the fact that a lot of us at work struggle with difficult personal stuff and aren’t always coping so well with it. If it achieves the aim of making us a bit more sensitive to each other’s wellbeing, then that’s a good thing. However, I would hope that many people don’t take the phrase literally and approach their colleagues with more empathy, as Joe suggests, by asking more open-ended questions. And… Read more »

Gino Caspro
Gino Caspro
7 years ago

There is a danger in asking ‘R U OK?’ when not suitably prepared for a negative response. Leadership particularly, when approaching staff need to have an understanding of where appropriate supports can be accessed should they uncover both personal and or medical issues for their staff. Really, the concept of ‘R U OK?’ can be a can of worms for organisations who should consider the capability of their leadership in dealing with personal or medical issues and the resilience of health and wellbeing strategies – particularly mental health – to be strategically positioned to adequately respond and afford support.

Tom
Tom
7 years ago

How about “Check-In” day? Ask people to ask people to check in before the start of each meeting.

More on HRM